#134

How much are you in resistance to what is?

One of the goal-setting tasks I consider for a new year is ‘what’s my word of the year?’. What word would encapsulate a high-level theme that would be relevant for me during the coming year? What word if I reminded myself of it regularly would shorten the odds of me being a better version of myself?

The word I’ve chosen this year is 'abundance'.

As I reflected on 2023, I recognised a tendency – particularly when stressed, busy or overwhelmed – to get frustrated when things didn’t quite work out the way I hoped or expected. I got caught in a ‘lack’ perspective – there was always a lack of something – time, money, connection, opportunity, whatever it was there wasn’t enough of it 😊

So, it got me thinking – what if I were to expect abundance?

What if instead of arguing or debating or getting frustrated with what I don’t have, expect what I do have to be enough thereby attracting even more – for everyone?

Perhaps I could find a way to accept the way it is and yet expect – effortlessly – more to show up in order to move on or through it?

In the past when I’ve found a way – by accident or design – of accepting the reality of the situation, I’ve been able to channel energy and attention into the next step rather than focus on what should have been. The next step may have been something I could do, something I have to let go, or something else entirely. The point being that my energy and attention weren’t focused on arguing with what happened but instead focused on what might be next.

And in accepting it, perhaps I could pivot to expecting an abundance of it.

On reflection I didn’t practice this as well as I thought I could or should so I'm doubling down on it for 2024 and adding the upside – abundance.

Anyway, here’s to 2024 - it’s a living, breathing, work-in-progress experiment.

So how about you? How much do you resist what actually happened?

How much energy and attention do you invest in trying to argue with what is?

Reframe National Quitting Day into National Perseverance Day

Apparently there’s a day in January called National Quitting Day – who knew! So called because it’s the day that on average most people quit their new year goals or resolutions.

In chatting with a buddy of mine, Jim Steele, he suggested reframing it into National Perseverance Day. An opportunity to reframe quitting into an opportunity to practice perseverance. Great reframe 😊

So, next time you feel like quitting, perhaps you could reframe it as an opportunity to demonstrate determination, persistence or perseverance and see if you push through the average.

CNN Life: How to restart our New Year's resolutions

To help, I’ve included a link to the thought process.

Question of the week:
What else could be true?

In working through some difficult relationship conversations I’ve found this question keeps the conversation open to potential blind spots.

If you accept that in most conversations there’s my truth, your truth and the truth, then the question helps to focus the mind on what else could be happening here?

Try it – when you are struggling with an interpretation of something ask yourself the question “what else could be true here?” and see where your thoughts go.

Quote of the week:
"Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary" The Good Quote

Go on, tell them how much you appreciate them. You never know the impact it might have. You’ll also feel good in the process. Do both of you a favour.

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That's all for this week. If you’ve been enjoying the Weekly Whispers please feel free to forward it to friends and anyone you think would benefit.

As always, please send me an email at [email protected] to send me your feedback or to let me know your thoughts.

Cheers

Pete