#138

Worried what others think of you? Don’t. They don’t think of you anywhere near as much as you think

I’ve been walking my learning edge a few times recently. Putting myself out there with un-refined ideas; un-polished thoughts; imperfect solutions with an intention to see what builds from it.

In moments of reflection, I tense up and that little voice inside that we all know, only too well, starts to judge and doubt…’what will they think (of me)?’…’will they get the idea (code for will they get me)’…'what if they don’t like it (me)'.

In an attempt to practise what I preach I took a little time to get silent, allowing my mind to go quiet.

Bizarrely, the number 57 came to me. What does it mean? I looked back at previous whispers and here’s the essence of Weekly Whisper #57.

Recently I’ve written about the comparison monster that lurks at my door. I find myself comparing myself to those that I think are doing better than I am - all wildly subjective of course and often not helpful! Then I came across this piece by Tim Urban with a simple yet enlightening visual.

We're wired to care deeply about what other people think of us. Worrying about this can influence our life choices and hold us back from living our best lives. Good continual reminder: everyone's actually focused on their own lives and not thinking about yours. Tim Urban

Tim posts some long form articles which are worth the time investment. Here’s one that takes the concept further and deeper.

Wait But Why - Tim Urban

Now I know what you’re thinking – that was lucky; coincidental; random; or some other unknown explanation for what showed up.

However, I’ll take it. I was a little stuck mentally. Took my own advice and asked ‘what agency do I have here?’. A random idea struck me to go quiet and listen. For what ever reason, Weekly Whisper #57 showed up.

Of course, I could probably connect many of the previous whispers to my challenge but I’m allowing grace to take place.

How about you?

Where are you stuck? Go quiet and see what appears.

Question of the week
If you are irritated by every rub how will you be polished - Rumi

Imagine if you thought of the rubs, the bruises, the painful events, the things that don’t go your way, as part of the polishing experience. I wonder if it would help you to look beyond the immediacy of the ‘rub’.

What’s been rubbing/polishing you recently?

 
Quote of the week:
When we reach the end of our days, our life experience will equal what we have paid attention to, whether by choice or default - William James

Ancient wisdom entirely relevant for our (lack of) attention economy.

So, what are you paying attention to? Do you even notice which story you are feeding?

Time for a wake-up call without the drama 😊

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That's all for this week. If you’ve been enjoying the Weekly Whispers please feel free to forward it to friends and anyone you think would benefit.

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Cheers

Pete