#188

A leader I was working with was struggling with uncertainty.

She was about to make a big career move, stepping into a role that felt both exciting and daunting.

“I just don’t know how this will play out,” she admitted.

“I’m worried about the next 6 months—what if I fail? What if the culture isn’t the right fit? What if I regret it?”

I asked her, “How far out does your uncertainty go?”

She paused. “Six months, maybe more.”

Then I asked, “And where does your certainty stop?”

That took a little longer. “Probably next week,” she finally said. “I know what I’m doing this week.”

“Great,” I said. “So instead of over-thinking the possible unknowns of the next 6 months, focus on where certainty stops. What do you know about next week?”

She exhaled. “Well, I know I have a meeting with my new boss. I know I’m going to start listening, observing, and learning. I know I can show up with curiosity, even if I don’t have all the answers. In fact, I could be certain about a few great questions.”

Her physiology softened, her face lightened and she was reverting back to the person that was hired in the first place.

For everyone, life is full of unknowns. The big ones—career shifts, relationships, health, purpose. The small ones—how a meeting will go, whether the right words will come, if the timing will ever be "right."

Our brains are wired to reject and avoid as much uncertainty as possible.

Staggeringly, to the point where we’d prefer the certainty of pain than the unknown possibility of maybe something will or might not be painful

UCL News: Uncertainty can cause more stress than inevitable pain

Nature.com: Motivations underlying self-infliction of pain during thinking for pleasure

When we don’t know what’s ahead, we hesitate, we overthink, we try to control the uncontrollable.

But what if, instead of resisting the unknown, we worked with it? Instead of spiralling into “I don’t know,” we could ask ourselves:

"What’s the OneKnown?"

When you feel lost, uncertain and are facing down an unknown, ask yourself:

How far out does my uncertainty go? (A month? A year? A lifetime?)
Where does my certainty stop? (Tomorrow? Next week?)
What’s One Known within that timeline? (I’m confident about the projects I have to complete tomorrow)
When facing many unknowns, a tough decision, a big change, or an uncertain future, you don’t need to see the whole picture. You just need one thing to step toward. The OneKnown.

So the next time you’re staring into uncertainty, don’t try to force clarity where there is none. Instead, find your OneKnown. Let that be enough.

Make progress through the unknowns OneKnown at a time.

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Cheers

Pete